Okay Someday
by Taisi
Summary: "But you still wish someone would just look you in the eye and tell you it's okay. Even if it's a lie, you just want to hear them say it- just once." Because Leo understands, and Percy needs to hear it.


A/N: Drabble-tastic! Because it just kinda plops you in the middle, here's the backstory: Percy's being melodramatic and freaking poor Leo out with his over-the-top angst. Shameless bromance will ensue. Aaand GO.

* * *

><p>Leo couldn't stand the silence anymore. He stood, and immediately all eyes were on him. "I'm gonna go talk to him."<p>

Jason was on his feet in an instant. "_No, _you're not. He's seriously unstable, Leo, he could- "

"Shut up." The sons and daughters of Hephaestus winced, averting their eyes as their senior counselor's tone turned sharp in a way it usually never did; none of them watched Leo throw a heated stare in Jason's direction, pausing on his way past the campfire. "He'd never hurt me- he'd never hurt _any _of us."

And to his credit, the son of Jupiter hesitated for a moment. Then he went on with the sensitivity of a tornado, "You don't know that. His mom's probably _dead_, and he's probably going mad in that cabin of his- "

The fire behind Leo roared ten feet higher, and everyone around it but his siblings and Piper drew back with a collective gasp. The pyrokinetic boy's eyes flashed, and he didn't have to say anything at all; he walked away, and the fire settled down. He heard Piper's voice snap something disapproving and Jason respond in humbled tones.

It had taken every ounce of self-control he had to stay with the other campers anyway. It wasn't fair that he had to sit there with the rest of the masses while Percy was holed up by himself, suffering.

As he approached the second grandest cabin in the camp, he saw two heads whip around to face him, a rather familiar demigod and satyr duo. He offered Grover a weak smile, receiving a rather sad bleat in return, and steadied himself against the glare offered him by Annabeth. She really didn't like him for some reason.

"He won't open the door," the daughter of Athena ground out, concern making her look more vicious than usual. "He won't let us in!"

"He doesn't want to," Leo said with straining patience, and gestured for them to get out of the way as he stepped up to the door. He saw out of the corner of his eye Grover drag Annabeth away by the arm when it looked like she would rather argue. _At least he cares more about Percy than about who helps him. _He took a deep breath and called out, "Perce? It's Leo."

His only response was silence; the cabin remained dark and still. "Listen... I know you've had just about all you can take of people pushing their feelings on you when all you want to do is feel your own stuff first. All of it- it's overwhelming." He clenched his fists and thought of those first few foster homes, those strangers who'd looked down on him with such pity.

"All these people, crowding you with useless words- like somehow suffocating you with them will make things better. Telling you they care- that makes it _worse. _Right? Because it makes everything so much heavier, and now it's about to crush you."

_Please, Percy, open the door._

"And you don't _want _to deal with their shit. You want to deal with _you, _and you just want to be alone. But, Percy... it's scary." His heart was thumping in his ears as he remembered those nights in the sewers, curled in on himself and sobbing his heart out with no idea how to stop.

"When all those people finally back off, and you're _finally _on your own- " His words were choked suddenly- when did that happen? His eyes stung, wetness dripping down his cheeks; he barely felt it. "When you're finally on your own you don't know what to _do, _Perce. You just keep bleeding and there's no one there to help anymore 'cause you ran away."

_Ran away from the worried faces and friendly smiles because they felt too much like home._

"And somewhere way deep down, you think you don't _deserve _them. Because in the end, it's all your fault- and everyone will tell you different and you don't want to hear it, you can't _face _it. Because you know they're wrong."

_And she'd still be alive if it wasn't for you, Leo. Your mother would be alive if it wasn't for _you_._

"...Leo?"

"But you still wish someone would just look you in the eye and tell you it's okay. Even if it's a lie. You just want to hear them say it." He bit his lip to keep in a sob that he knew would break him if he let it and closed his eyes. "Just one time."

_It's okay._

"And...I don't want you to go through that, Percy. You'll come out hurting, and...and scarred." _The scars don't go away. _"So if...I can help...I _want _to help. I want to help you- "

Leo didn't have time to do anything but blink through heavy tears as arms pulled him in, close and tight, against someone's chest. He'd never noticed Percy open the door, but the older boy was right there in front of him, holding him like he was someone who _deserved_ it.

And something about being held like that, _now_, when his heart lay open and bare the way it was, made him choke back what might've been a whimper and force out more words, while he had the chance, before Percy was gone again.

"I don't want you to be alone, Percy, I don't, because I _know- _I know how that is, really, and you're not the _same _after it- y-you, you question everything, everyone, you wonder if anything good could possibly be r-real- "

Those arms threaded around him even tighter, strong and secure and he felt like such a hideous person, crying on someone in so much grief already but he couldn't make himself _stop._ He hadn't allowed himself to dwell, had never allowed himself to slow down for even an instant because as soon as he did this hurt would catch up and cut his legs out from under him and he'd be stuck- he wouldn't be able to run anymore, to keep himself safe-

Now he'd stopped running, finally, and it had him- like clingwrap around his arms and legs and his face, and he couldn't break free or _breathe- _

"And I'm, I'm sorry, really, this is s-stupid, but I don't w-want you to get broken 'cause I wouldn't be able to f-_fix _you. I-I can't even fix _me._" He swayed dizzily, but Percy stood firm. "I want to help, I want to help you save your mother like I couldn't save mine- I..."

Percy should've been disgusted- he _should've _been- but he held Leo closer still, like the two of them were the only people in the whole world despite his two friends standing not far away, murmuring soft things into Leo's hair and wrapping him up tighter than the despair ever could.

It was impossible to be embraced like that without embracing back; Leo put his arms around Percy in turn, slowly, like he was coming up out of water.

"I'm the one who's sorry," Percy spoke quietly. "For overreacting and hiding myself away- and for scaring you. I'm not going anywhere, I promise. None of us are going to leave you behind. You picked a safe place to stop, fire-boy."

_Just once._

"Everything will work out," Percy continued, drawing Leo back against him as though he couldn't bear the distance the arms' length had put between them. "You'll see. It'll be okay, Leo."

His eyes slid closed.

_It'll be okay._


End file.
